After seven long months of exile from his beloved dog park, a Golden Retriever named Bark Twain, has expressed his grievances, saying that while baby food scraps are a decent consolation, they are “nowhere close to sniffing 14 butts in a row.”

Bark Twain, 5, a previously pampered canine, enjoyed a pre-baby life filled with Frisbee catches, belly rubs, and almost daily visits to the local dog park. That all changed when the Twain family introduced a tiny, squealing human named Max into the household.

Read the rest of the satire news article here at TattletaleTimes.com