im sad and have noone to talk to about it… except for wifey, and two friends… but this is about one of the two friends, and they are friends with each other too… and telling wifey about it always leads to me feeling worse because she’ll say clever things like “just talk to him about it” …
i dont want to talk to him about it, that would mean i would have to acknowledge the problem and address it directly.
what a silly way to deal with emotional turmoil, am i right?
no i know im not right… i wouldnt be posting this crap if i knew i was right. i know im wrong and i should talk to him about it but i just cant ;_;
yeah… i know you must be thinking i need therapy and you would be absolutely right, except i hate going to the doctor and them being a special type of doctor for the mind and such doesnt make my detestation for docs any better.
sorry this really isnt about me being transfem. i AM transfem, but that doesnt have anything to do with the rest of it… except i cut off most people i knew even before i transitioned… just because they would no longer be part of my daily life. which sucks but i guess i did this to myself so serves me right.
anyway, im sad, tired, nostalgic and have no point. thanks for reading ._.
You sound frustrated with the situation and how none of the paths you can think of seem viable. It also sounds like you feel alone and disconnected because you feel you can’t talk to the people close to you about this issue…
One thing you could try would be to write the problem down, park it for right now and try to do something that makes you feel better, or something that helps you feel connected to the people close to you.
It won’t directly solve the problem, but it might break you out of walking in circles. Sometimes the brain comes up with better ideas when you give it a bit of time