My spouse and I have been doing some restructuring of our finances now that they have a new job as of a month ago. We’ve been doing an equitable split of our finances based on income which involved us taking inventory of everything we’re paying every month.
This led to me really taking a closer look at all of my debt and that has me really bummed out. My best friends just bought a house and I’m in the hole for 84k US worth of student loans, credit cards, medical debt and a refinance loan I took for my previous credit card debt while I was getting my second degree.
A big motivator for going back for a second Bachelor’s in Computer Science was knowing I could make more money and be able to pay off my debt sooner. However currently I’m getting paid a little less per year than I owe back. Also, my work life is having a negative impact on my mental health so I’m also looking for other jobs when I can.
It feels like I’m doing all I can but it’s barely enough to make a dent in my debt each month. If I fall apart and lose my edge I’ll get fired and then I’ll end up accruing more debt. I’m also worried about being discriminated against by future employers as a trans person (being misgendered daily at my current job is a reality). But my stamina bar is super low and it’s hard to take further action when I feel so powerless.
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My best friends just bought a house
ah, comparison is the thief of joy! i’ve seen people buy houses even though they have massive student debt. i’ve also seen people buy houses they couldn’t really afford. or, if you’re like my partner, their parents paid for their school and gave them $10k to help with the down payment on their first house. life’s a racket!
other folks have already offered suggestions on how to tackle your debt, but i’d also like to throw in that ynab (paid) changed how i think about money. splitwise (free) has also been an invaluable tool for living together with somebody and sharing costs equitably.
That’s the rub isn’t it. You’re not supposed to ever get out of debt. As long as you are in debt, someone’s earning interest on it. And that debt can even follow your family long after you are gone.
And that debt can even follow your family long after you are gone.
No it can’t. At worst it can be taken out of the estate before the heirs/recipients in the will get their cut.
No debt can be passed to family members except for if they co-signed something or they somehow have shared responsibility for a debt (like being named on a credit card account), which is not the case in about 99.9% of situations.
I didn’t say all the debt, or even a lot of it. You even gave an example of debt that can follow your family.
Edit: this is also assuming you are in the US. Which isn’t the whole world.
FWIW, you don’t need the CS degree to pivot to software. Start learning, build a project portfolio, and attend local tech meetups. Unless you really want the academic experiences, you’re footing unnecessary literal and opportunity costs. Around 30% my colleagues have unrelated degrees.
Working and learning at the same time is quite a bear to tackle, so you’ve certainly got the gumption.
Things vary from company to company, but tech is pretty chill about trans* stuff. I’m out and one of several at my current company. No pronoun issues.
I already have the second degree.
I don’t doubt many people have transitioned into the industry without one (judging from my time helping to teach a free coding bootcamp) but many jobs, including the one I have and the ones I’ve been applying for, do require a “Bachelor’s Degree in Computer Science or similar field”
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Yeah I’ve been a software engineer for 10 years and have never even been asked about schooling which I’ve never done. Maybe at faang jobs but that isn’t even remotely the majority of tech jobs. Software engineering is what you know more than certifications
In NYC it’s “Bachelor’s Degree in Computer Science or X years of relevant experience" in 99% of jobs I’ve applied to in my short 7 year career as a developer. Disclosure, I have just a BS in Biology.
I’m sorry to hear you are struggling. It may take time and it may be a tough road, but you can absolutely dig yourself out of this hole.
I’d recommend focusing on one loan at a time, if the whole makes you feel overwhelmed. While I’m not the biggest fan, Dave Ramsey suggests paying loans off using something called the snowball method. I think this can help you, because it will allow you to have wins and see progress faster. Since it sounds like you are struggling with motivation and seeing progress, this method will be the most useful. Small, achievable goals are important!
Basically, you pay the minimums on all of your current loans. Then you pay any extra on your loan with the lowest balance. Once that is knocked out, you take what you were paying for the first loan (minimum payment plus the extra) and put it towards your second smallest loan. A secondary benefit with this approach is that you will reduce your required cash outflow if you do end up losing your job. Good luck!
My sister got into substantial credit card debt in the earlier 2000’s when credit cards were given to teenagers like candy. She did the snowball method and also gave herself a treat every time she paid one off she bought herself another pair of shoes (and couldn’t buy any shoes without paying a debt off first). It took time but she was able to whittle away at it and got out of the debt.
You’re not alone. There are a lot of people in your position. As others have said, it may make sense to set reasonable goals, and give yourself a small reward when you pay off a card or reach another milestone you set.
As someone else said, pay minimums on everything, except the smallest card, where you put all the disposable income toward. That will get paid off quickest, and then you move to the next smallest. The only way I can think of this being a bad plan is if you have a large debt with a significantly higher interest rate, in which case pay as much to that as you can, then move down the line.
