While they’re busy loading your bike, hop into their driver’s seat. If you’re lucky, maybe they left the keys in the ignition, free car! If not, either surprise the fuck out of them and ask “Where are we going?”, or call the law, or just beat the shit out of them, your choice.
I always found it weird bicycles don’t have proper lockers for them.
I bought a folding lock.
Nothing is impregnable but this is pretty tough.
https://www.abus.com/int/Consumer/Bicycle-locks/Folding-Locks/BORDO-6000K
True, that’s not exactly a common built in feature.
Mine is made of almost pure chrome plated metal, maybe I should electrify it… ⚡
You could also train a dog to guard it.