• Iraglassceiling [she/her]@hexbear.net
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    1 year ago

    I think spoonie culture is a little cringe but wtf are you doing appropriating the language of chronic illness to describe your entitled colonizer mindset? Fuck off.

    • Huldra [they/them, it/its]@hexbear.net
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      1 year ago

      It’s literally not even like the context you use that shit in, you have like too few spoons to be able to wash up after dinner or shit like that, if you are spending spoons on literally just passive sympathy for a political struggle then you’re operating in a new dimension of cutlery theory.

      • Iraglassceiling [she/her]@hexbear.net
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        1 year ago

        I feel like when the idea was first introduced it was a helpful metaphor, but now it’s a weird token of victimhood? As a person active in the CI community when I meet someone who self identifies as a spoonie I roll my eyes and prepare to be exhausted.

          • Iraglassceiling [she/her]@hexbear.net
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            1 year ago

            Ok, what I’m talking about is people who engage in illness Olympics and endless one-upsmanship because their symptoms are their identity. I am allowed to be exhausted by people who belittle my experience as a chronically ill person with a multidimensional life.

                • autismdragon [he/him, they/them]@hexbear.net
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                  1 year ago

                  Ah, ok. Well I personally consider my autism central to who I am as a person, and wrapped up in every aspect of who I am. Its why I dont want a cure, because it would make me a fundamentally different person. A cure would be murder. So I don’t like detaching autism from myself like that. But I see what you mean, I at least understand where you’re coming from now.

                  I guess for me I see a difference between someone who “identifies as as spoonie” (which seems silly) and someone who uses spoon theory to describe their situation (which I think any disabled person can do).

                  • quarrk [he/him]@hexbear.net
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                    1 year ago

                    I can see where each of you is coming from. I suppose the lesson is that the person ought to be the one deciding how much their identity is bound up with their condition? For example, many people develop mental illness later in life, so it feels more like an acute affliction rather than something they were born with.

                  • Iraglassceiling [she/her]@hexbear.net
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                    1 year ago

                    I just want to jump back in and clear up something: I am not talking about autism. I don’t honestly feel that the term spoonie as it originally was developed applies to people with autism/autistics, I always understood it to be a measure of physical illness. (If you want to use it for your neurodiversity you are welcome to do so, but then you’re not who I’m talking about when I talk about spoonies.)

                    I am in constant physical pain. There is no social model for my disability. I am in agony.

                    Also yes 100% to your second paragraph, exactly that.

        • Iraglassceiling [she/her]@hexbear.net
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          1 year ago

          You are mistaken about the origin of the term. Vigilantes are gross, but malingerers also do real, tangible harm to people who have to contend with the medical system and the term “spoonie” is certainly overused by a certain kind of bad faith actor in the CI community.

      • iie [they/them, he/him]@hexbear.net
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        1 year ago

        iirc the “spoons” thing started with (or was popularized by?) a youtube video about mental health, which used an analogy where you start the day with a set number of spoons, and the spoons represent how much mental energy you have to accomplish tasks. During the day, you spend your spoons in various situations, potentially running out of spoons if you overexert yourself. Conditions like depression are said to reduce the number of spoons you start the day with. The analogy helps some people to not beat themselves up for struggling to get through the day.

        • GriffithDidNothingWrong [comrade/them]@hexbear.net
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          1 year ago

          I just read up on it and its fine if it helps people, but why spoons? It seems to be that anyone so dense they can’t grasp that day to day activities tax your limited reserves probably wouldn’t grasp your weird spoon analogy. Why not use fuel or batteries or money or something else that people would understand as a limited resource necessary for operation?

          • machiabelly [she/her]@hexbear.net
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            1 year ago

            because the person who thought of it was eating lunch with a friend. They just used what they had on hand to make the point. I think its part of the reason why people use the term. Its cute. It could be more descriptive. But, when talking about sensitive subjects people like a bit of levity. The spoons add that.

            • I read the story and I can see how it can help people conceptualize their struggles. I guess i just question the utility. If someone doesn’t understand that the pain you feel or lack of energy or whatever often leaves you unable to do everything you want to do, they don’t lack comprehension they lack empathy. The spoons thing seems more like its performative theatre for people who already get it. Which is fine, of course, it just sets my teeth on edge a bit for reasons I can’t really explain. Thank you for clarifying though

              • machiabelly [she/her]@hexbear.net
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                1 year ago

                Yeah of course. I think it gives you gsa queer or flag wearing queer at pride energy. Like people are going to think its too much. Or too unserious to respect.

                Of course, I dont think that but its understandable that it would bring that up.

          • TheDialectic [none/use name]@hexbear.net
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            1 year ago

            Cause putting it in videogame terms isn’t gonna work on normal people. If some one put a hand to their head and said OOM. Us internet poisoned people would get it but we aren’t the target audience

        • RyanGosling [none/use name]@hexbear.net
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          1 year ago

          This sounds likes something from the 1850s. I feel like using a battery analogy would be more intuitive in the modern day. To me anyway, feeling uncharged throughout the day makes more sense than “running out of spoons”