I have so many friends who would 100% be labeled as an incel if they were men. They hold men to impossibly high standards while meeting none of those standards themselves.
For example, women living with parents while expecting men to have their own place, women who are obese but are only interested in fit men, working part time while expecting a man who has a career, refusing to drive and expecting men to chauffeur them around, expecting men to have a variety of friends and interests while doing nothing but watching TV all day, etc.
The worst part is, calling out this inequality will 100% get any man labeled as an incel. We’re expected to either deal with it or be alone forever.
This is NOT to undermine the very real issues women have to deal with, for example the loss of bodily autonomy in the US. But this is still an issue worth discussing and nobody is talking about it.
While you certainly have a point, I think that approach is one-sided. We, as a society, absolutely have similar expectations of women. It’s shallow of her (and a bit odd to hear someone admit to) to be so dismissive of her ex’s penis, but we absolutely dismiss the value of women that have small tits or ass, or their lack of willingness to do certain sexual acts. You wouldn’t dismiss a cute bartender for being useless, but you would absolutely dismiss a bar-owner (and thus, very useful) for being ugly.