It’s kinda like going to a new job. It’s only scary because it’s new. As long as you’re not on your phone the whole time or driving drunk it’s a lot easier than you’d think

Tbh the hardest part (at least in America) is some intersections are weird, but 90% of the time you’ll have people in front of you to copy and figure it out.

Sounds like a pretty normal first time out. You’ll get used to the streets around where you live and then you’ll get the same experience the first time you drive somewhere new. Then again the first time you get on a high speed highway. Then the first time you drive in a city downtown.

You’ll get comfortable with all those situations eventually and each one will make adapting to the next situation easier.

I never learnt to drive as a kid because of anxiety, but now I don’t because of mental health reasons (namely ADHD and chronic fatigue) and philosophical reasons (fuck cars). I usually walk to places or catch trains and I think that’s also better for my mental health than stressing about cars, maintaining them, or injuring someone.

I also think I’m allergic to tire soot as my chest tightens and my sinuses die when I walk by a highway. So there’s also that.

Don’t push yourself beyond your limits with driving, because your and other’s safety will be on the line. That being said though, you should be fine as plenty of other people with ADHD manage driving :)

Whatever happens to you, I hope you stay safe!

I used to HATE driving. Couldn’t be convinced to enjoy it in any capacity for the first two years or so. But eventually, you get to a point where it’s just second nature, and it ends up just being a time where you’re alone in an enclosed space and can just listen to music or books or something and almost meditate (of course, still paying attention to the road, lol). Now, I LOVE driving! It’s normally pretty relaxing, even if I have to go on longer 5-6 hour drives every few months. It most certainly gets better with time :)

Relax, it’s completely normal to feel strange. You’re learning a new skill, plus you’ve grown up watching fiery car explosions. Modern cars are well designed to prevent injuries in crashes.

I fucking love driving, I even have a manual.

I fucking hate other drivers and bikers, to the petty point of wishing a terrible death to those who can’t follow basic traffic rules.

It’s intimidating but once you get over that initial hurdle you’ll be amazed how second nature it becomes in time.

(not ADHD, very likely Autistic)

I can’t drive either. I thought it might improve over time, but I committed to a year of driving my daily commute and it didn’t improve at all. Having to constantly keep my attention on the road and road signs continues to be incredibly exhausting, and it eats up so much of my time. I’m probably going to have to pick it up again soon out of necessity and I’m not looking forward to it.

I hate driving so much that I choose to live in a place with good public transportation and bike lanes so that I don’t have to.

I’m not adhd but I do remember my first lessons and it was like you described. Sooo many road signals and inputs to process. It DOES get easier with time, a bit from muscle memory, a bit from learning how to the vehicle handles and responds (there is a small learning curve with learning a new vehicle every time though). And yeah, learning on a suv is not the easiest thing. Driving in the dark is also more complicated (having to pay so much attention to bikes for example). So basically you are learning on hard mode! It took me 20+ hours with the instructor to be ready for the exam, so don’t despair!

I would suggest a few things:

1. Be consistent: When you drive, even if you are not experience, if you maintain the same speed and acceleration you should be fine as other cars can predict your movement and go around you.

2. Use the triangle signal: If you felt a little bit uncomfortable just click the tringle signal. Other cars will be scared of you and gave you the right of way and hopefully slow down.

3. Drive in optimal condition:

Sleepy ? Rainy or foggy weather? Need to eat or use the washroom? Dont drive. Take an uber if needed but don’t drive.

4. Drive slowly:

Even if people get angry at you ignore them. Driving slowly increase your ability to react to denger. If someone bother you use the triangle signal and they will think something wrong with your car and ignore you.

I managed to get a license, but have barely driven in the 10 years since. If I ever need to drive again, I’ll probably take some lessons again since I have 0 confidence. The car I learnt to drive in could just pull away from standstill (even on a hill) with only using the clutch. My parent’s cars could not, which made me constantly stall in stressful situations and forced me to basically relearn many tricks. It ruined the little confidence I had. Add to that the fact that I struggle with reading other people’s intentions, which can get stressful when zooming around in a car at 60+ kph. The final nail in the coffin is that I have no car and want no car. I can get everywhere I want with my bicycle and public transport just fine.

Maybe at one point I will have to force myself to drive, since it can be pretty handy to be able to drive when I need to move houses or help family or something.

Stressful, but you learn how to deal with the stress. It took me baby steps to get into driving, and living in a small town just a minute drive away from a giant parking lot did help out heaps with getting over the nerves.

A good thing to keep in mind for me is that most people out there aren’t being dickheads. Many are, but most people just wanna get home safely. A lot of those people are unfortunately, unbelievably stupid behind the wheel. Drive defensively. Stay aware of where every vehicle nearby is in relation to your own, try to give vehicles as much space as necessary, and make sure your mirrors are covering as much blind space as possible. You can usually find small mirrors in auto shops that glue to your wing mirrors which can help cover a blind spot the regular mirrors might not be able to. Assuming everybody is actively trying to kill you can help learn defensive driving, but I prefer to expect people to be passively stupid rather than actively malicious. Same end result but with less anger.

You are absolutely not alone. When you first start out, everything is overwhelming because the minutae hasn’t become muscle memory yet. You also get better at anticipating what other drivers on the road are about to do, and your reaction times get quicker.

Check out defensive driving concepts like covering the brake when reducing speed by moving your foot from acceleration to hover over the brake pedal, in case you need to press it. Looking 3 cars ahead of you to see the flow of traffic ,managing your own speed, leaving 2 to 3 seconds of space between the car in front of you (usually at least one car length if not more). Using signals, watching for hazards, and above all else, staying calm.

At first just lining up your wheels with the lines on the road takes a little thought, but once you get that down you can return to it when you feel overwhelmed, then ya take a breath and scan your mirrors. You will be just fine!

I like driving, but I’m a total hoon. You’d think you’d grow out of it at 21 but at 40 it’s still racecar.

I’ve got a very small car (935kg) with a stick shift and stiff suspension. Environmental feedback is your friend. Tune your car to exaggerate it. You’ll zone out much less.

Full-pace forces full attention.