I haven’t watched the Percy/Vex Dalen’s Closet episode yet and keep avoiding it because of emotional damage. Same with Wilfred (show about Elijah Wood and his naughty dog)

Battle Map!

Ozo Cruth and Vex’alia

Vax’ildan!

Sam’s Mug

CENTAUR OF ATTENTION

Sam’s Shirt

• 04:01:14 “Dump.”
• 04:04:53 Vex’alia:“It’s good to have you back.”
• 04:05:28 Laura:“I’m gonna do something crazy. I’m gonna shoot two arrows…”
  Sam:“At Trinket.”
• 04:08:31 Vex gets a HDYWTDT
• 04:10:28 Lieve’tel:“I don’t think he’s here. I haven’t seen him in twenty minutes.”
• 04:11:28 Taliesin demands a Harry and the Hendersons scene and Sam delivers
• 04:12:24 Liam:“Take the bear, leave the kaiju.” (ref: Godfather line “Leave the gun, take the cannoli”)
• 04:18:10 Keyleth’s painful reminder of Vax’s eternal debt
• 04:20:50 “Champion, the deed here is done. The next fight we bring to them. To Issylra, to finish what they might not be able to. Come.”
• 04:22:04 Percy:“The children would love to meet you. And finally find out how much I’m embellishing the memory of you.”
• 04:24:20 Vex:“No, fuck the battle. You’re here with us.”
• 04:27:01 Vax:“Tell me about these nieces and nephews.”
  Percy:“We can do better…”
• 04:30:08 Scanlan stomps his hoof twice to denote the number of children he shares with Pike

♪Episode Song References♪ ROUGH DRAFT (Beacon timestamps)

ᕕ( ᐛ)ᕗ

• 00:22:40 Michael Jackson - Remember the Time
• 00:26:35 Blazing Saddles - I’m Tired
• 00:28:26 Vanessa Carlton - A Thousand Miles
• 00:31:55 Pinocchio - I Got No Strings
• 00:36:42 Montell Jordan - This is How We Do It
• 00:39:43 Merv Grifin - I’ve got a Lovely Bunch of Coconuts
• 00:47:20 Fergie - London Bridge
• 00:52:06 Freak Nasty - Da’ Dip
• 00:55:25 TLC - No Scrubs
• 01:08:29 By Mennen Jingle
• 01:17:43 Chumbawamba - Tubthumping (I Get Knocked Down
• 01:33:29 Manfred Mann - Blinded by the Light
• 01:44:52 Michael Jackson - This Time Around
• 02:11:24 ♪Scrag! aaaahh!♪ Queen - Flash Gordon
• 02:33:46 Harry Belafonte - Day-O
• 02:37:15 ♪whinny and poo♪ Winnie the Pooh Theme
• 03:07:07 Madonna - Like a Virgin
• 03:13:00 Bette Midler - From a Distance
• 03:16:40 David Bowie - Rebel Rebel
• 03:41:36 Coolio - Fantastic Voyage
• 03:54:51 John Williams - Indiana Jones Theme
• 04:00:40 The Old Gray Mare
• 04:01:08 Ashley imitates the Wonka Piccolo Tune
• 04:05:52 ♪Hunter’s Mark the worm♪ Frank Sinatra - Fly Me to the Moon
• 04:13:11 Staind - It’s Been a While

Highlights

• 00:15:36 Down below
• 00:40:10 Marisha:“Who’s mind-fucking me?”
  Travis:“Isn’t that always the question?”
• 00:41:35 Travis is unsure about the spelling of Lieve’tel, “There are a bunch of E’s and V’s in there, somewhere.”
  Ashley:“Lieve Schreiber?”
• 00:43:18 No Mercy Percy.
• 00:48:18 Travis:“If only you had more time to prepare…”
  Laura:“Shut up!”
• 00:51:43 Taliesin:“There’s no wrong way to eat a Reese’s.”
• 00:53:08 Vidulch from above shatters a rock on the map into rubble which Matt replaces with gravel and some flare.
  Travis:“He just Salt Bae’d that shit!”
• 00:54:45 Ozo Cruth:"Children it’s feast time. Scrag, show them a welcoming.
• 01:00:52 Liam:“Save us, Cerkonos.”
  Robbie:“I’m not even on the map, baby. Me and Pike are having a latte.”
  Ashley:(sips drink)“This shit’s crazy, right?”
• 01:07:09 Three-point landing.
• 01:08:46 Laura:“What do your horse eyes see, Scanlan?” LotR reference
  Travis:“What do your whore’s eyes see, Scanlan?”
• 01:09:42 Scanlan's Hand!
• 01:13:50 Ozo’s glass sword’s name is Carnage and another mace weapon is named Bone Graver.
• 01:17:25 Head & Shoulders
• 01:19:07 Ozo:“Vorak, take your pick.”
• 01:19:54 “Dildo nightmares.” - Sam
• 01:23:47 Cerkonos casts Conjure Animals at level 5
• 01:27:52 “What I Would Like to Do” by Ashley Johnson
• 01:37:00 Vorak swallows Grog
• 01:39:05 “Should’ve put handrails.”
• 01:40:22 “Bozo Cruth?”
• 01:42:31 “Lieve’tel usually survives…” [Note: this is factually incorrect]
• 01:44:15 Lieve’tel’s concentration drops her 8th level Holy Aura spell
• 01:48:27 Percy pulls out his Greythorn Stick
• 01:51:02 Professor Anders the windup toy successfully poisons everything in range.
• 01:57:57 Vex comes in like a wrecking ball dealing 72 damage and bringing Trinket into the battle
• 01:59:00 Marisha channels Pâté into her elemental briefly while busting out Earthquake under the Malleus Key
• 02:05:05 “What did you do in the war?” (about the blinded Reiloran that keeps falling down stairs)
• 02:07:49 Sam:“There’s a bear on his back. He’s bear-backing!”
• 02:10:12 What about Grog?
• 02:13:42 Travis mimes Grog taunting the tower to fire at the worm eating him.
• 02:14:14 Poor Laura plagued again by “fart noises”
• 02:15:26 Vex is driven to the ground
• 02:17:37 Lieve’tel:“I left Raven’s Crest for this purpose. Lady, I am here to serve your will. Your champion’s prison lies before me. Unlock his fetters and pull that beacon to me.” Divine Intervention Let’s. Fuggin. Go.
• 02:19:37 Fan Art Moment The swarm of ravens encircling the tower and imploding against the armor around the relic (Vaxilorb)
• 02:21:13 “Back and to the left.”
• 02:22:39 Grog starts his turn taking acid damage.
  Taliesin:“We’ll buy you some Pink Floyd.”
• 02:25:31 Grog deals over 100 damage with three attacks and is freed.
• 02:29:55 Fan Art Moment For a second, you see seven different versions of Scanlan and six different timelines, one in which he’s a ghost, one in which he’s a king. In that moment your eyes come back to reality and the hand pulls the beacon free from the center of the tower, at which point, the Bloody Bridge shuts down and you see these glimmering beams of red light are sent adrift in the space between Ruidus and Exandria… The rainbow gossamer threads of magic around the world that were on the cusp of tearing themselves apart begin to return to their natural order.
  INTERMISSION
  *As we’re jumping in, it is the middle of Scanlan’s turn, after managing to tear the remaining beacon from the center of the Malleus Key, and as such, shutting down the Bloody Bridge and releasing Ruidus from its arcane-locked placement in the sky. *
• 02:34:24 Scanlan succeeds in casting Dominate Monster on Scrag
  Liam:“Just don’t let it hit Trinket.”
  Sam:“Yes, I will tell him to to kill ANYthing on its back.” (teasing Laura knowing Trinket is holding Ozo Cruth)
• 02:35:27 Scanlan backs up his horse butt against Lieve’tel to protect her from attacks.
• 02:35:46 Matt does the “You don’t know” callback before declaring “Ozo’s go.”
• 02:26:44 Frenzied Wrath allows Ozo Cruth to make an additional attack for every successful hit. Much like Dorian’s father’s sword’s ability.
• 02:39:39 Vex’s defensive ability knocks Ozo prone and Matt decides he will continue attacking from the ground without advantage.
• 02:43:54 Vex’alia falls
• 02:47:22 Grog’s Sentinel ability prevents the great spined worm Vorak from fleeing
• 02:47:39 Something happening offscreen to ask Marisha about.
• 02:50:47 Pike:“Everlight, please. Not today. Please bring her back.”
• 02:52:18 Vex is back up to 1 hp playing possum.
• 02:53:50 Metapigeon appearance
• 03:00:28 Grog tanks several light hits easily
• 03:01:14 Round 3
• 03:02:16 Taliesin:“I’m within 90 feet of dat ass now.”
  Percy emits residual smoke from his corrupted past (due to the impassioned anger at seeing his love killed) and Hexes Ozo Cruth.
  Sam:Is this Smoke Monster?"
  Taliesin:“It’s just happens when I’m really pissed.”
  Laura:“Or really turned on.”
• 03:03:38 Percy tosses a ball-shaped item called “Manners” into the fray, but unfortunately doesn’t connect and resembles a failed attempt at catching a pokemon.
  Marisha:“You were tryin’ to catch that Charizard.”
• 03:04:29 Matt noticed Sam’s shirt
• 03:11:19 Travis:“You’re going into the suck?”
  Laura:“I don’t know where else to go. Where is the not suck?”
• 03:16:50 The Earthquake spell brings down the tower
• 03:18:44 Liam:“Balls deep.”
  Laura gets the giggles.
• 03:20:26 Vax is back and joins the initiative order.
• 03:22:55 Sam pleads with Matt that he was being an asshole and didn’t mean to attack Trinket.
• 03:23:31 Fan Art Moment Ozo Cruth noticing his prized companion Scrag, ridden by an armored bear, bearing down on him to attack.
  Laura:“I love that Trinket is riding his back, though. Trinkets having the fucking time of his life.”
  Travis mimes Trinket doing the one-handed rodeo rider pose.
• 03:24:54 Ozo’s lookin hurt
• 03:26:30 Contact with the beacon momentarily distracts Lieve’tel, but she still gets off a Mass Heal cast at level 9 (max level 700 HP to distribute).
• 03:34:02 Grog’s turn, he heads straight for Ozo Cruth, singing his own theme music, and going into a Frenzied Rage
• 03:36:18 Fan Art Moment Grog’s HDYWTDT against Ozo
  Grog’s Home Run Music is almost heard in the background.
• 03:37:54 Ozo’s pets (Vorak the worm and Scrag the Vidulch) gain the Feral and Frenzied conditions
• 03:45:25 Cerkonos’ W.W.S.D. (What Would Scanlan Do) Bracelet
  Cerkonos:“Hey! You look like diseased genitalia! Does it burn when you urinate!?”
• 03:48:00 Pike, seeing Cerkonos’ flame from the inside of the worm, successfully grants Wargod's Blessing to his attack.
• 03:51:00 Fan Art Moment Pike’s 7th level Inflict Wounds does the trick (foot ha!) and the worm spits her back out.
• 03:51:42 Matt and Sam:“Turnpike.”
• 03:53:14 Laura’s voice pitch progressively increases
• 03:54:32 Scanlan drops a log
• 03:55:44 Liam:“It’s called…”
  Sam:“Butt stuff.”

(continued)

Omar loaf

Ashley’s copy of Der Katzenprinz on the table.

Fan Art Gallery: Life or Death

by STV Armstrong

by Zhellers

by The French Belphegor

by Blue Beast

by Suzy Snoo

by Pawthorn

Battle Maps!

No worries,
Having the Critical Role tag in the Author space is helpful for searches in the Amazon database. I’m sure it won’t take credit from the author. Plus it’s already kinda established that CR is all about giving proper credit, hence why the art scroll isn’t just submissions anymore, rather a vetted group of artists who regularly contribute. Even their reputation for recognizing and celebrating behind-the-scenes crew is still good from past and present contributors, last I checked.

Also coming in March 2025!

Vox Machina–Stories Untold

Fan Art Gallery: Blue Promise

(posted along with the November Cosplay gallery from last week)

by Galactic Jonah

• 02:10:15 Athodashionus gets the next kill
• 02:12:46 Rollies: Xandis vs Magical Siege Weapon (distant AoE dispel shots)
• 02:16:00 Cerkonos joins the Air Ashari in a rescue of a nearby airship with Essek’s brother on it.
• 02:19:00 Vex:“I tie ropes.”
• 02:20:24 The best they can.
• 02:22:53 Grog’s cape temporarily disables a member of the crew. “Look alive, Percy!”
• 02:24:30 An epic battle below can be seen
• 02:27:54 Vex:“I’ve got you, darling.”
• 02:28:49 Xandis:“I think we’re about close to your off poit. You should get the fuck out of here. I’m gonna turn around.”
• 02:30:11 “Get off the boat already!”
• 02:37:30 Dragoon Cerkonos
• 02:39:05 Broom Sharpshooters Vex and Percy

INTERMISSION

Because of the midair rescue, the team lands slightly off course from the Malleus Key. Pike and Grog land first nearest to a weaponized dispelling tower and the rest of the team glide towards them into battle.

• 03:09:03 Fan Art Moment Keyleth’s entrance igniting into a fire elemental as she lands.
• 03:11:22 Sam:(noticing Robbie hasn’t rolled high on initiative)“Where’s Cerkonos?”
  Robbie:“You shut the fuck up.”
• 03:12:48 Sam unveils his Ruth Bader Ginsberg shirt
• 03:14:46 Fan Art Moment 4th level Hail of (Fiery) Thorns
• 03:16:30 Commitment to the Coconut Bit
• 03:22:03 Fan Art Moment Percy:“En garde!”
• 03:24:40 Gun sword cane! (code name: Briar’s Bane)
• 03:24:57 Marisha:“Ooh, push it into me.”
  Laura:“Excuse you?!”
• 03:28:52 Grog gets a killing blow on a Reiloran in the antigravity field, sending it flying like a ragdoll
• 03:30:55 Keyleth gets a killing blow
• 03:34:14 Lieve’tel casts Planar Ally and summons a massive, three-headed white raven.
• 03:34:47 Robbie gets hit with a stereo ♪Makinmyway♪
• 03:35:47 The Vex mini falls of its broom
• 03:38:03 Toll the Dead with the visual of Bertrand’s gift bell
• 03:38:35 Everybody’s coming
• 03:39:45 Scanlan is swarmed by seven slithers
• 03:41:22 A pulse is felt as the Area of Effect dispelling tower seems to reactivate. For a moment “the mystical shape of some sort of ceremonial, armored, high-crested, robed Reiloran with weird symbols and shapes on its armor and crest” appears at the top of the tower; an extremely powerful-looking ghostly image of some massive ancient Reiloran.
• 03:44:40 Deva stats
• 03:47:14 “What balls?”
• 03:48:13 Sam and Taliesin get Marisha to pick at her teeth on camera
• 03:49:41 Cerkonos casts Wall of Flame at 4th level to make it a cylinder around Scanlan, roasting the swarm around him.
  Travis:“That’s a spicy meat-a-balla!”
• 03:51:52 Scanlan:“Don’t worry about me, man! Impress Lieve’tel!”
  Robbie:“I’m not going to Force Cage you, I promise.”
• 03:52:22 Liam:“Work the ball.”
  Travis:“Nobody breaks balls better than you!”
• 03:53:23 Travis:“The tip is always very sentitive, Matthew.”
• 03:54:34 Travis:“Fuck off, ghost!” (C2 callback)
• 04:01:45 A Vidulch joins the battle
• 04:05:20 “Scuuuze.”
• 04:09:04 Ashley:“Sheesh, lobstrosities.”
• 04:13:01 Matt and Taliesin synced
• 04:14:13 Boobs of Feral Leaping
• 04:16:00 Ashley:“How dee doo dee doo dee?”
  Matt and Travis:“No.”
• 04:16:57 Marisha:“Because Grog gave me an idea.”
  Taliesin:“That is the worst phrase.”
• 04:18:50 Marisha goes for old faithful Firestorm
  Travis:“Fuckin’ Keyleth flying in on the (A)C-130.”
  
• 04:22:33 Sam makes the 24 beep
• 04:22:48 Keyleth killing innocent bystanders since before the stream.
  Marisha:(British accent)“Sorry…”
  Travis:“I love the smell of napalm in the morning.”
  Robbie:(fading)“You guys are bad heroes.”
• 04:24:22 Travis:“Says the guy with a horse’s ass.”
  Laura:“Scanlan’s just down there pooping all over the battlefield.”
  Sam nodding in agreement
• 04:25:23 Devils join the battle on the side of Exandria followed by Opal, the Twice Crowned, Champion of the Spider Queen
• 04:27:15 Robbie laments that Opal’s epic entrance wasn’t witnessed by her old teammates
• 04:29:53 Grog:“Taint!”
• 04:30:37 Fan Art Moment Epic fight on the back of a rampaging vidulch
• 04:32:26 Grog:“'Cause you’re a flea and I’m me.”
• 04:36:13 Scratch that, reverse it.
• 04:38:50 Marisha sneezes (Stop it)
• 04:39:47 Cerkonos takes his fire elemental form.
• 04:42:56 Laura:“Okay okay.”
• 04:44:55 Scanlan’s lightning whinny
• 04:47:34 The welcome sight of brass wings as Devo’ssa arrives.
• 04:50:11 Smack those jugs (juggernauts)
• 04:54:39 Travis:“I hate bad acid rolls.”
• 04:56:29 HDYWTDT
• 04:56:56 Wingman Shorthalt
• 05:00:58 The Judicators are surrounded, but holding their own
• 05:02:24 Fan Art Moment Opal’s arachno-gasmic execution of the vidulch

♪Episode Song References♪

ᕕ( ᐛ)ᕗ

• 00:20:35 “needtogoback” Vanessa Carlton - A Thousand Miles
• 00:30:17 “lock the door” Scissor Sisters - Let’s Have a Kiki
• 00:48:10 ♪every time they get together♪
• 00:54:13 Bert Parks - There She Is
• 00:54:49 Barenaked Ladies - One Week
• 01:09:41 Tupac - All Eyez On Me
• 01:21:58 It’s Been A While
• 01:31:27 ♪I’ve got an axe. I wanna play♪
• 01:39:55 “no love for the horse(whores)” Snoop Dogg - Gin and Juice
• 01:53:45 Laura:♪Into the sky♪
• 02:07:07 Marisha:♪Into my arms♪
• 02:23:40 Taylor Swift - I Bet You Think About Me
• 03:06:56 Stealer’s Wheel - Stuck in the Middle with You
• 03:17:00 Chappell Roan - Hot To Go
• 03:17:47 Cardi B ft Megan Thee Stallion - WAP
• 03:26:00 Flight of the Conchords - Motha Uckas
• 03:33:04 LoVM Soundtrack - Beads of Love
• 03:34:45 Vanessa Carlton - A Thousand Miles
• 03:38:39 Skylar Grey - I’m Coming Home
• 03:38:52 Harry Nilsson - Lime in the Coconut
• 03:44:10 Oliver Musical - Consider Yourself
• 03:45:08 Jared Diamond Commercial
• 03:48:03 Vanessa Carlton - A Thousand Miles (again)
• 03:56:07 Dueling Banjos
• 03:58:57 The Weather Girls - It’s Raining Men
• 04:00:51 Silento - Watch Me Whip/Nae Nae
• 04:06:55 ♪with my mandible♪ Nine Inch Nails - Closer
• 04:10:22 Vanessa Carlton - A Thousand Miles (again)
• 04:12:25 ♪tale as old as time♪ Beauty and the Beast theme
• 04:15:24 ♪take em out♪ Offspring - Come Out and Play
• 04:23:16 Bert Parks - There She Is again
• 04:25:29 Cat Stevens - Moonshadow
• 04:25:47 guitar riff Lenny Kravitz - American Woman
• 04:29:17 Creed - Higher
• 04:36:35 ♪What does a vidulch butt even look like?♪
• 04:39:49 ♪I want roasted lobster♪
• 04:46:29 Brenda Lee - Rockin’ Around the Christmas Tree
• 04:50:19 Wham! - Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go
• 04:57:30 ♪you say♪ Lisa Loeb - Stay
• 05:01:26 Van Halen - Runnin’ with the Devil

Highlights

• 00:03:32 Marisha:“Ten seasons and a movie.”
• 00:11:26 Scanlan and Jameson reminisce about bonding over group activities
• 00:15:30 Epic horse SFX
• 00:16:31 Grog:“So, when you need to go ‘boom boom’, you just rock nasty?”
• 00:17:31 Pike wants to know how Cerkonos thinks he can stop Vox Machina
  Keyleth:“This is getting heated over horseshit.”
• 00:21:00 Marisha(elderly actress voice):“Like good ol’ times! I walk through a tree.”
• 00:27:44 Old Bear Trinket

• 00:28:19 Vex’s locket is extending Trinket’s life.
  Percy:“I’m gonna end up in there. Don’t think I don’t know that.”
  Vex:“Don’t think I haven’t thought about it.”
  Marisha:“That is a Black Mirror episode.”
• 00:30:07 “All da scritches.”
• 00:32:27 Whitestone Andy?
• 00:33:00 Pike updates Scanlan on their kids, Juniper and Wilhand’ildan (nicknamed ‘Wax’)
• 00:33:52 Meat Man Imports and Sexports
• 00:39:41 Night’s rest complete, though maybe a little “Grog”-y
• 00:42:55 Vex’alia notices the banners of Syngorn (her homeland)
• 00:45:39 Percy doesn’t want to give up his rifle corps defending Whitestone, but concedes to Vexalia
• 00:47:41 Cerkonos picking up on inuendo
• 00:48:15 The shadow of a golden/brass dragon, Devossa (J’mon Sa Ord) flies overhead
• 00:49:45 The Stratos Throne and Aeshannador (first-time allies for the conflict after long war with one another)
• 00:54:02 Lieve’tel! (Her name was the last word from Bertrand Bell as he perished)
• 00:56:00 Cerkonos is smitten.
• 00:57:09 Vex delivers the unfortunate news about Bertrand
• 00:58:19 Lieve’tel joins the party
• 01:01:35 Fan Art Moment The holy warriors of the different temples of Vasselheim heading out for battle after final sacraments.
• 01:02:35 Matt’s special wind
• 01:06:00 Fan Art Moment Lieve’tel makes a rousing speech and receives a blessing from the Raven Queen, seen initially as a haze around her that glows incrementally out of nothing. Winged Celestial warriors “from realms beyond, a beacon of hope, to bolster your job this day.”
• 01:09:45 “Why’d you have to say that?” (Matt laying on the pressure)
• 01:10:42 Exandria, once again we stand united against an existential threat. United again, as we have many times before, against beasts and behemoths, demons and demigods. Once again, we will overcome this pervasive play for an unjustified power, for Exandria does not belong to a single entity, or individuals, or even an entire council of deities. Exandria belongs to us. Once again, we will reclaim that ownership for Exandria.
  Fuck shit up!
• 01:13:53 Lieve’tel’s bell keeps ringing as though continuing to cheer on Keyleth’s words. It was a gift from Bertrand Bell.
• 01:17:30 Vex:“Let’s bring that ‘big dick energy’, shall we?”
• 01:18:28 The silver dragon, Athudashionus emerges from the Platinum Sanctuary.
• 01:19:30 Allura gets to brief Vox Machina on the strategy
• 01:24:04 Scanlan:“This seems like elder abuse. What are you doing?”
• 01:25:40 After smelling Sam’s ancient mug from the first campaign, Travis is reeling.
  Laura:“Are you gonna barf?”
  Travis:“I went too hard.”
  Taliesin:“Anyone else feeling like delighting themselves with an olfactory experience?”
  Ashley:“I kinda want a little bit to know…”
  Matt:(announcer voice)“Tragedy struck in Los Angeles this past week, as…”
• 01:26:54 Battlestar Galactica Season Three had a ton of fights
• 01:27:04
  
• 01:28:18 “Get your shit together.”
• 01:29:03 Cerkonos:“I feel like I botched it, Scan-man…I should cover myself in shit? Oh, okay.”
• 01:30:30 Cerkonos’ intense focus listening to Scanlan is hilarious. “Eyelashes…pockets…”
• 01:32:58 Achivist Seth Domade (a.k.a. Essek Thelyss), son of Thela.
• 01:34:50 “Archivist Seth Rogan”
• 01:36:36 Airship captain Verin Thelyss.
  Laura:“Hot Boi Numba Two!”
• 01:39:00 Verin asks Keyleth to sign his book of Air Ashari poetry.
• 01:40:19 The brothers Verin and Essek (as Seth) depart while engaging in a small squabble about etiquette.
• 01:40:50 Pike:(teasing)“Keyleth? Can you sign my tits?”
• 01:41:28 The Ruidus team is in position
• 01:42:03 Fan Art Moment Allura’s casting of the magical green signal flare
  Allura grasps her hands around and you see her fingers seem to grab the air, like it’s some sort of a molasses, leaving dark streaks of color behind as she swirls her arms around. Gathering it like clay, and then thrusts it into the air. You watch as the streak of dark light rises into the sky and suddenly gives off this burst of bright green color…The symbol of war has been triggered.
• 01:43:06 Allura:“I’m getting too old for this shit.”
• 01:45:38 Sam confuses sauntering and cantering until Taliesin jogs his memory with an elbow to the face.
• 01:46:42 Sam:gun round chamber sound
• 01:47:30 Vex’alia and Keyleth get Power Word: Shield and Death Ward-ed
• 01:48:38 Cerkonos offers Lieve’tel a Goodberry in these trying times.
• 01:50:15 Captain Xandis Keybane, Esquire.
  “Welcome to the Key Breaker. I hope you’re comfy. We’re about to go ahead and return to the place where I crashed my last ship to victory!”
• 01:51:27 Xandis says “You know” very much like Jester.
• 01:51:38 Xandis uses they/them
• 01:53:23 Fan Art Moment The gateway opening for the “Key Breaker”
• 01:54:21 Grog has heard capes are perfect in combat situations, unlike Edna.
• 01:59:00 Anti-aircraft artillery magic
  Vex:“You can dodge that, right Xandis?”
  Xandis:“I can certainly try!”
• 02:00:28 “Whoah.”
• 02:01:09 Cyclops wyvern creatures with leathery red wings
• 02:04:40 Percy:“Drop the horse!”
• 02:09:25 HDYWTDT for Grog!

(continued)

Sam’s Mug

Fan Art Gallery: Blue Promise

by Alessia Trunfio

by Kate Holley

by Original Emm

by Ben Edwards

by Hellebore Soul

by Blue 13 Beast

Chetney got run over by a Silgoat

(by FaeolinTheWildElf)

Chetney got run over by a Silgoat,
Walking home on eve of Winter’s Crest.
Fearne and I aren’t sure that we believe him,
But that is what his speak with dead professed.

He’d been drinking Sandkheg’s Hide
And we begged him not to go (don’t go Chetney)
But he forgot it was a full moon
And then staggered at the door with Fearne in tow.

When we found him on Crest’s morning
At the scene of the attack (let me tell you something)
He had hoof prints round his waistline
And incriminating horn marks on his back.

Chetney got run over by a Silgoat,
Walking home on eve of Winter’s Crest.
Fearne and I aren’t sure that we believe him,
But that is what his speak with dead professed.

Now we’re all so proud of ourselves
We’ve been taking this so well
Watch us in here reminiscing
Playing cards and drinking Shanks with Dorian

It’s not Winter’s Crest without Chetney
All his toy’s sit on a rack
And we just can’t help but wonder
Should we share out all the gold that’s in his pack? (gold in his pack!)

Chetney got run over by a Silgoat,
Walking home on eve of Winter’s Crest.
Fearne and I aren’t sure that we believe him,
But that is what his speak with dead professed.

Now the goat is on the table
And Fearne has sobered up at last
Laudna’s making shadow puppets
As we laugh at the C-pop flag we left half-mast

We warned all our friends and enemies
Better watch out for your own (Not Ludinus)
“They should never give a licence, no
To someone who drives a sleigh and plays with gnomes”

Chetney got run over by a Silgoat,
Walking home on eve of Winter’s Crest.
Fearne and I aren’t sure that we believe him,
But that is what his speak with dead professed.

Chetney got run over by a Silgoat,
Walking home on eve of Winter’s Crest.
Fearne and I aren’t sure that we believe him,
(Fearne and I are sure no one will confess)

(revised songs below by me)

Carol of the Hells

We are the Hells, first word is Bell’s
New thing today, spells gone away
Danger around, hunting us down
Night into morn, Ruidus born
Seeming to be part of the key
for ending of Exandria.
Chetney and wood fighting for good
(Ex)Zandria’s flat. Pâté the rat.
More than a fey, what’s Fearne today?
Orym, I mean, total ‘short king’

Why is it us? Who’s Ludinus?
Meeting the gods. What are the odds?
Merry, merry, merry, merry Critmas
Merry, merry, merry, merry Critmas
Fucks up with that? I’m not a cat
Alarm is set. (Is) zit Thursday yet?

Plank King Kingsley (Good King Wenceslas)

Kingsley the Plank King looked down
at his feets uneven
then his trouser pants fell down
and his butt was steamin’

All the people laughed and cried
at his but a-steamin’.
When he tried to pull them up
he slipped and fell
On. His. Butt.

What Was Once the Robit F.C.G. (Once in Royal David’s City)

What was once the robit F.C.G.
Now are scraps and part of their head
“It’s okay, my friends have saved me.”
Last words 'fore their eyes turned red