• CluckN@lemmy.world
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    3 months ago

    Gets huge government grant

    Fires 120% of staff

    Uses ChatGPT to tweet gospel

    Funnels the money into private car collection

    Bungie could never compete with this CEO

  • thesporkeffect@lemmy.world
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    3 months ago

    He should have prayed harder over the decision to double down on selling auto immolating products for several years because it was cheaper than fixing the problem

    • NegativeInf@lemmy.world
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      3 months ago

      His solution to the sell off is mass layoffs, stock buybacks, and r&d cuts.

      You know, stuff you need the most when trying to save your business from itself.

      • frezik@midwest.social
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        3 months ago

        A while back, I heard a theory that eventually, Intel will just be a fab producing AMD chips. Thought it was a long shot back then, but now it might be the company’s best outcome.

        • sevan@lemmy.ca
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          3 months ago

          That would be a lucky outcome for Intel, they can’t compete with AMD’s current fab (TSMC).

  • Media Sensationalism@lemmy.world
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    3 months ago

    Intel is supposed to be heading domestic chip production very soon. An Intel failure could have significant national security implications. The fed won’t allow them to fail.

      • golden_calf@lemmy.world
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        3 months ago

        AMD has no chip fabs. They use TSMC like most other big chip companies. Intel is one of the few that has their own fabs.

        • Wilzax@lemmy.world
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          3 months ago

          I don’t find the company to be any cockier than any of their competitors. AMD fanboys are all definitely too cocky though.

          • kittenzrulz123@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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            3 months ago

            They have been making CPUs and GPUs that are just worse then Intel and Nvidia for a long time and refused to make them better. The 9000 series offers very slim improvements and AI nonsense nobody wants.

    • Redjard@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      3 months ago

      This is likely already priced in and the reason they aren’t completely gone.
      What remains of Intel are their foundaries.

    • Zetta
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      3 months ago

      What do you mean “heading domestic chip production”, Intel already produces chips in Phoenix.

      Both tsmc and Intel are building brand new fabs in Phoenix, I can’t be bothered to check but I’m pretty sure the capabilities will be pretty matched so they won’t be heading or leading still.

      • frezik@midwest.social
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        3 months ago

        The fabs they own now aren’t competitive at the high end. Though I like to point out that this is myopic way of viewing the industry. Not every microcontroller needs TSMC 3nm; they’re perfectly happy running them off for tens of pennies per unit on ancient nodes, and those chips go into every little piece of electronics that isn’t thought of as a “real” computer. A huge portion of the pandemic supply chain issues (the ones that were actually valid and not just an excuse to raise prices) came from these little chips.

        With that caveat in mind, the high end is still important.

        The calls of “they took government money and then laid off employees” are off base. That government money is going into specific fab projects. Has nothing to do with the rest of the company. Unless there’s some kind of siphoning of funds into the rest of the company (admittedly totally possible, but it needs specific evidence), that’s not particularly relevant to Intel’s situation.

        The company should probably reorganize as strictly a fab and stop making their own stuff. AMD did very well for themselves by ditching their fabs into a separate company–Global Foundries–and then buying manufacturing capabilities from the best fab they could afford. Intel could go the opposite way, with AMD becoming one of their customers.

  • JackbyDev@programming.dev
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    3 months ago

    If you’re new to the stock market then yes, because it means a discount!

    My condolences to retirees who need to live off 401ks with no bonds. Everyone else, wee! Discount time!

  • Evil_Shrubbery@lemm.ee
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    3 months ago

    These really need to be posted with sauce dates.

    Bcs it’s funnier if this particular twatt (a post on Twatter) is more than 3 days old.

        • nova_ad_vitum@lemmy.ca
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          3 months ago

          They’re too big to fail both in sheer size and strategic importance. I don’t see the US government actually letting them fail. But what do I know.

          • Zron@lemmy.world
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            3 months ago

            I’m sure Intel makes all sorts of chips for military hardware.

            They won’t be allowed to die. How will the missile be able to subtract where it isn’t from where it is if the chip that does the subtracting isn’t made anymore.

            I’m wouldn’t be surprised if there hasn’t been a full investigation into the intel fabs due to this. If consumer chips have been melting themselves for years due to shit manufacturing, shouldn’t someone in the DOD be asking if the chips in their fancy missiles are going to melt themselves halfway to the target?

            • captainlezbian@lemmy.world
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              3 months ago

              They won’t be allowed to die, but we can pressure the government to buy and hold. It’s known that the 08 bailout and sale at a loss was a bad look. A government owned chip company isn’t a bad idea for national security and federal funding

            • zarenki@lemmy.ml
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              3 months ago

              The conditions that processors run under in situations like military equipment are drastically different from those of consumer devices. Consistency and stability are more important than performance in those contexts. So much so that RTOS systems like VxWorks are popular in that space. They’d probably already have features like clock boost disabled (or use processors completely lacking it) in favor of a lower fixed clock speed, probably avoiding these issues entirely.

        • Trainguyrom@reddthat.com
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          3 months ago

          Realistically speaking, Intel is an industry juggernaut with extremely valuable IP up the wazoo, extremely lucrative contracts with major partners, etc. the number of extremely good Intel chips, the number of consumer and business use cases where an intel chip is the best choice.

          I really don’t forsee them going out of business, and I don’t see them ceasing production of x86 processors. The lead time on new processor development is almost a decade, so the next several generations of Intel Processors are too far into production to be prudent to cancel (and probably will be perfectly worth releasing and selling assuming these microcode and fabrication issues are limited to 13th and 14th gen)

          I think the biggest shift would come if there’s significant flaws in the 15th & 16th gen processors. That would certainly be enough to need to significantly alter their business model away from x86 processors development, because that would be about 3 years of horrible sales and tarnished reputation and that would be more than enough time to pivot existing IP that isn’t affected by this into workable new products, even if it’s just “let’s run the E cores at 3x the power budget” or “drop the voltage to nothing and sell only mobile chips” or even “let’s drop the process node on 12th gen and play with that for a few years”

    • Evil_Shrubbery@lemm.ee
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      3 months ago

      Huh, I was about to say that can’t be right bcs of the overall “economy” growth in that period but yeah, you are right.

  • Avatar_of_Self@lemmy.world
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    3 months ago

    Company profits up but share price down? Fire some C-Suite.

    Company has never profited and there’s no plan but share price up? Give C-Suite performance bonuses.