Sometimes I enjoy talking to feminists and misandrists. It helps me to understand their viewpoints. Some feminists are open to debate and some are not. I don’t try to change their minds. It can be pretty toxic.
I was messaged by feminists on reddit. They read my post history. I haven’t said anything misogynistic. They called me an “incel” and a “misogynist”. I remained calm when they hurled insults. If I lashed out, it would prove to them I am a misogynist. They want their opponents to get angry.
One woman who messaged me said she is proud to be a misandrist. She said men are worthless, driven by hormones, and many other nonsense things. She also said women don’t perpetrate domestic violence. Eventually I got her to calm down and she became more respectful.
I think a lot of feminists misunderstand what MRAs believe in and want. There was a question in the r/askfeminists sub if feminists would collaborate with MRAs. Many of the feminists said no. One commenter said MRAs are misogynists. Another said men are not oppressed, so there’s no need for MRAs. Some people hate us for doing the right thing.
Some feminists have told me there’s a difference between feminists and misandrists. Most feminists think they’re normal people. I think some misandrists use feminism to their benefit. Governments and corporations definitely use feminism against men.
I don’t know too many feminists in real life. I don’t talk about feminism or politics with the women I know. It is silently understood that most people believe in equality. I’m also an egalitarian.
After knowing about men’s issues, I don’t want to pretend like they don’t exist. If I started dating a feminist, I don’t think my political views would align with hers. I’m not sure if it would be a good idea to talk about men’s issues.
Do you think it’s better to avoid dating women who identify as feminists? If you date a feminist, is it a good idea to talk about men’s issues?
Really depends on the woman more than anything. A lot of people say they are progressive/feminist/democrat/etc because they’ve been told that good people are these things, and they’ve never really thought about why.
This. Many women (especially young ones) haven’t thought too deeply about the matter, and have simply swallowed the propaganda that feminism is for gender equality. If the woman you’re wanting to date is one of those, I don’t necessarily see a problem. But if she’s regurgitating misandrist nonsense, then avoid like the plague.
I can say, “I believe in equality, but I don’t identify as a feminist,” if she asks.
It depends. Some simply believe that wanting equality = being feminist. In that case it isn’t really a red flag. Otherwise, ask yourself if you want to spend your time with people you disagree with. Personally, I don’t think political disagreements are a dealbreaker and can occasionally find a civil argument fun, but at the same time I wouldn’t want to date someone who refuses to listen to me, or attacks me for my beliefs. Just being identifying as a feminist is definitely not enough to disqualify someone.
Nobody honestly believes feminism=equality. There’s always the unspoken caveat “only women significantly face inequality”.
And suddenly it’s not so much “this concerns everyone” and more “this is not about you”.
The truth of the matter is in the word itself.
I grew up being taught that feminism is simply wanting men and women to be equal. Only as an adult, have I found that was not the case. But if you either stay in your echo camber, or simply don’t really participate in debates about feminism, it is very possible to never change your mind.
Nobody honestly believes feminism = equality.
I don’t understand what you mean here.
This is only fun to do from the safety of the internet
These people feel no problem being violent or inciting it against men irl, and use feminist weapons like the Duluth Model to tear men down and steal from them
I have a friend who seems to be a left wing feminist. I haven’t talked to her about politics.
tread carefully
If they can get you accused of something, then they can convince themselves you’re one of “those” people and dismiss any and every argument you made they didn’t like hearing.
I won’t talk about men’s issues with her.
In my experience women who identify as “feminists” are a red flag even if not radicalized or only passingly familiar with the concept. They almost alway turn out either self involved or in the process of being radicalized.
Feminism as presented in medias and politics for the last ten years has been very masks off. Very teenage girl tantrums. People who identify with that are bad news.
Over the last few years I’ve learned self-love and stopped bending over backwards to accomodate my friends and started expecting to be treated fairly. The feminists have evaporated like dew in the sun, the actual friends are closer than ever.
Modern feminism appeals to the types who want to feel superior and/or make everything about themselves. At this point in my life I’m no longer willing to put up with that and so they selected themselves out of my life. I’m much better for it.
Oh I see.
In my experience women who identify as “feminists” are a red flag even if not radicalized or only passingly familiar with the concept. They almost alway turn out either self involved or in the process of being radicalized.
Feminism as presented in medias and politics for the last ten years has been very masks off. Very teenage girl tantrums. People who identify with that are bad news.
Modern feminism appeals to the types who want to feel superior and/or make everything about themselves. At this point in my life I’m no longer willing to put up with that.
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Funny thing I like doing the same with people who have opposing views. That’s why I’m here.
Do you think it’s better to avoid dating women who identify as feminists? If you date a feminist, is it a good idea to talk about men’s issues?
From my personal experience it’s really interesting to be with someone who has partly extremely different views. It helps to understand more of the world and see things from other perspectives. Definitely can help with growth as a person.
Except you’re not growing as a person, you’ve been stuck in denial on every topic every person here has talked to you about.
You defend feminism as fervently as a religious zealot, and then pat yourself on the back because you believe that you are “spreading the good word” like most missionaries not realizing you’re both wrong and horribly offensive in the process
Except you’re not growing as a person, you’ve been stuck in denial on every topic every person here has talked to you about.
Or wait, hear me out - that is what it’s like to have different opinions on a topic and talk about it. Does not mean to drop your own opinion immediately. You read what others people arguments and try to understand where they are coming from, and share your arguments and try to make your view more understandable to others.
You defend feminism as fervently as a religious zealot, and then pay yourself on the back because you believe that you are “spreading the good word” like most missionaries not realizing you’re both wrong and horribly offensive in the process
Please show me where I pet myself on the back?
And since you read my other comments here - If someone makes a convincing I will always acknowledge that. It’s just that most arguments brought up here, seem to me to come from deep misunderstand of feminism. Obviously you think exact the same about me. And I’m a curious person who likes to see where such arguments go.
By the way, care to elaborate what exactly I have said that offended you?
You’re not reading them tho, you’re immediately denying anything that might point fault at feminism and finding a way to blame men instead.
Such as with the Duluth Model. Which, when challenged with, you immediately went to “that’s not feminisms fault” despite not knowing what it was (bigoted feminist legislation), who wrote it (feminists), who doctored research to support it (feminists, and we have proof it was bullshit, as one of the authors testified they ignored any data that didn’t support their view), and who pushed it on society with the bullshit claim that women were greater victims of domestic violence than men (feminists, again, after fixing the data to make sure it showed that)
Your fallacious bullshit is obvious, so no you’re not “having a discussion”, because you haven’t understood a single point laid before you, in any of the 4 other threads I’ve seen you post in
