(Early 20s bi m)
This isnt a question on finding someone who’s interested, more on how to approach asking for things like sexting or even just discussing sexual topics without it coming across like thats the only thing Im interested in .
How do I ease into that kind of discussion in a way that would let me back off gracefully if I get the sense that the person I’m talking to isnt interested in that at the moment? What bridge topics could I use that are more innocuous than just dropping a “hey what are your opinions about buttfucking?” Into the conversation like a grenade.
I’d like to be able to use a lighter touch so if it seems like somebody isnt interested at the moment I could circle back when they might be more in the mood for that, or at least not ruin the non-sexual things I like about the relationship if it seems like they’re not interested at all.
I’m also fairly vanilla in terms of sexual interests, advice specific to kink would be appreciated since I’m kink-curious but isnt exactly what I’m looking for.
Ok - you met on Hinge so you have at least some assurance that they are looking for a physical relationship, yes? But they have not brought it up with you yet? You are into them and do want sex if they are down but like them in other ways so would like to be friends if not?
Maybe just touch them physically a little and see what response you get, if you are having trouble finding words? Hold hands?
Sort of an aside from OP’s original question, but when I was dating, I’d find ways to initiate light physical touch, like complimenting rings/nails to touch their hands, short contact with the elbow or back. Something to gauge their response without overwhelming their personal space.