My big beef (and this happens on S.O. all the time) is when I ask a detailed question about how to do some very specific ABC thing, and instead of answering, the responders try to question my requirements, turn the problem into a XY problem[1], or answer something totally different.
“What are you really trying to do?”
“ABC is not how I’d solve the problem I imagine you are working on.”
“I don’t know how to do ABC, but I know how to do DEF…”
“Why do you want to do ABC?”
I mean, thanks for all of your unsolicited design input, I guess, but I’m pretty specifically asking for help with ABC.
Urgh. In topics where I am the newbie, this is perhaps THE big reason I don’t ask help: I’m completely fine to the “I’ll teach you how to fish” people Mark Dominus complains about, but those “y u want to do ABC?” grind my gears.
If I’m asking you how to do ABC, odds are that I already looked for alternatives where I don’t need to do ABC. Stop assuming otherwise dammit.
From HN comments:
Urgh. In topics where I am the newbie, this is perhaps THE big reason I don’t ask help: I’m completely fine to the “I’ll teach you how to fish” people Mark Dominus complains about, but those “y u want to do ABC?” grind my gears.
If I’m asking you how to do ABC, odds are that I already looked for alternatives where I don’t need to do ABC. Stop assuming otherwise dammit.