I wasn’t ready for it and downplayed the emotional effects, it hit me like a truck because the haze of dysphoria kinda dulled my emotions for decades - plus boy socialization told me not to ever cry, so I literally had no ability to deal with the fact that I now cried like a lot and in front of people. I talked about it with my doctor and shed a few tears and he helped me see it in a gender affirming way instead of something to be embarrassed about (something like “well women cry in public sometimes”). I didn’t have a healthy attitude towards that kind of stuff and I’m way more at peace with it now, and in the back of my head I guess it’s affirming lol