Picture

Crying frog hiding his face

Transcript

>first time in gym

>my very first exercise is bench

>next to me are some zoomers and wiggers

>they snicker and say to themselves “This due looks like he sits behind computer 24/7”

>About to cry

>make up some bullshit like im thirsty and go to toilets so I can pack and leave

>Some dude stops me and say if he can use bench

>It’s motherfucking Chad just like from the memes

>say yea

>Asks if I will spot him

>o-okay

>We start to talk he noticed im first timer in the gym

>He teaches me lifts we talk for hour and for this whole hour it feels like im safe and protected

>Mfw this chad says “see you tomorrow okay ? I have leg day and i will teach you deadlifts”

Is this how chads are ? Is this how it feels to die for king? It felt like dram but it was al real.

My king

My liege

WE WILL MAKE IT !

  • Kit@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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    1 year ago

    Fr gym bros tend to be super wholesome to newcomers if you ask for advice. Not all of them, for sure, but I’ve had good luck.

    • oshitwaddup@lemmy.antemeridiem.xyz
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      1 year ago

      Absolutely. Everyone started somewhere, vast majority of the time everyone at the gym is rooting for you. And the people who aren’t are probably not worth respecting enough to care at all about their opinion

      it can be scary to talk to strangers at the gym, but I’ve had nothing but good experiences asking for help whether it’s form checks, spotting, asking to work in if the equipment you need is being used (help them load/unload their weight if you do this!), or even asking for help finding some weights or equipment (i wasn’t sure if the gym I was at had 2.5lb plates, asked, dude helped me look between his sets and found some). Of course there are always the occasional assholes, but I think they’re pretty rare, especially if you’re not an asshole first

    • ThatWeirdGuy1001@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      Incels

      I’m so sick of how this word has become a slur for any guy that isn’t a “Chad”

      You can barely even approach a woman respectfully without coming off as a creep for having the audacity to approach a woman at all.

      You don’t even have to be ugly you just have to have the wrong “vibe” which means anything other than being a well off attractive man with no hint of emotional baggage.

      This isn’t even a solitary incel talking point it’s even brought up by women about how men no longer approach them.

      Almost like every man who isn’t overly attractive with a well paying job being labeled a “creep” has caused most men to just say “fuck it it’s not worth the effort”

      And you can call me an incel but the statistics don’t lie that men have stopped approaching women because it’s not worth the potential headache

      • RepulsiveDog4415@feddit.de
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        1 year ago

        Incels

        They’ve touched a nerve, have they?

        aproach a women respectfully

        I hear this over and over by the likes of you. What does that even mean? You walk up to random strangers and expect not to come of as a creep? Yeah right…

        statistics don’t lie

        Ah yes all the numbers ans studies you’ve provided lol

        Here is a intreresting fact: Nationwide, 81% of women and 43% of men reported experiencing some form of sexual harassment and/or assault in their lifetime. https://www.nsvrc.org/statistics

        I wonder why women might be more carefull…

        Touch some grass, smh

        • Soulg@lemmy.world
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          1 year ago

          Nah he’s completely correct but gets downvotes because people think he’s defending incels because those people are morons.

          Being a socially awkward loner is not what an incel is. It’s just become a catchall for people society deemed weird, instead of the actual incels who are actually bad people.

        • ThatWeirdGuy1001@lemmy.world
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          1 year ago

          you walk up to random strangers and expect not to come off as a creep

          Yes. That’s the norm. That’s been the norm. How the fuck else are you supposed to meet people?

          Y’all can wave sexual assault statistics all you want but thinking anyone that approaches you is just a creep only deters people who aren’t creeps.

          All this extra hostility just makes guys who are even slightly insecure (me) just completely nope out entirely.

          But I can sit here and try to explain how I’m not an incel and don’t really have anything in common with most actual incels but this is the Internet and you’ve already made up your mind about me so this whole conversation is pointless.

          • RepulsiveDog4415@feddit.de
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            1 year ago

            You’re right, maybe i came of more standoffish and condescending than intended. Forgive me, I’ll try to be a bit more constructive.

            Yes. That’s the norm. That’s been the norm.

            The norm for whom? Yes some super extroverted people might do that, but you are you that type of person?

            How the fuck else are you supposed to meet people?

            The same circle of friends, volunteering in non profits, hobbies or common interests would be my recommendation. Or do it like anon and start a sport. Basically touching gras, as i said :P Some of my friends tried dating apps, but I’m assuming they are even more superficial than walking up to good looking strangers (haven’t tried them myself). Wouldn’t recommend work…

            thinking anyone that approaches you is just a creep only deters people who aren’t creeps.

            Please put yourself in their position. It’s really sad how common assholes and creeps are. There is a reason for selfdefense courses for women… Yeah you might not be a creep, but 9/10 are, so how could they tell.

            don’t really have anything in common with most actual incels

            The one thing you seemed to have in common was your lack of empathy for women. I have colleague who is getting stalked and you can really see how scared she is and how it warps her whole way of thinking… This was why i got so annoyed and condescending.

            this whole conversation is pointless.

            Only if argument for arguments sake is pointless to you. If it wasn’t already clear, i love arguing over nonsense. I’ll fight anyone who doesn’t like pineapple on pizza (:

            • ThatWeirdGuy1001@lemmy.world
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              1 year ago

              I have no problem arguing as long as the other person is actually willing to accept that I’m not what I seem.

              I do have respect and empathy for women, but I also know that the struggles they deal with aren’t going away anytime soon. The type of man that performs sensual harassment acts is not the type of man that’s gonna change because people start seeing him as a creep. He generally knows he’s a creep and has no intention of changing.

              All this excess hostility has simply put non creepy men off to the point of not wanting to try at all because all it takes to be a creep is to look in the wrong direction at the wrong time. And so all women see are the creeps because they’re generally the only ones still trying to approach women

              Then women say “why aren’t men standing up for us!?” and it’s because most women treat most men as just predators.

              Fuck I’ve even stopped a sexual assault and had the girl claim I only did it because I wanted to fuck her.

              Like she literally couldn’t even fathom that I just did it because that shits fuckin wrong. No it was only because pussy.

              I know my experiences aren’t universal but god fucking damn the amount of times I’ve been accused of doing something for the sole purpose of getting laid is fuckin unreal when I’m just trying to be a decent fucking person.

              No, me asking if you need help, isn’t me tryna get into your fuckin pants, you’re carrying 80lbs worth of shit and I can clearly see your struggling, stop fucking freaking out just because I offered to help.

              • CaptnNMorgan@reddthat.com
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                1 year ago

                My experiences haven’t been as bad but I do completely agree.

                On another note, nobody can recommend work for finding a significant other because if it goes sour it could effect a lot more than feelings. But if you aren’t comfortable approaching women, for whatever reason, work is a great place to build a friendship with someone that could possibly lead to more over time.

                It does gross out some women when you tell them every serious relationship you’ve been in was with someone you worked with, so definitely don’t let that slip until they actually know you. I was vibing really well with someone on bumble but as soon as I told her that, everything changed. Lots of “don’t shit where you eat” talk. And at one point she implied I was with my manager for reasons other than feelings. She might have just been in a mood but I’m pretty sure I dodged a bullet there.

                But that’s not everyone, there are so many really amazing women out there. Some of us just have to wade through a lot of shit first. Stop being so angry at people you don’t know yet, WORK ON YOURSELF and everything will fall into place. You will find your diamond.

          • ArcaneSlime@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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            1 year ago

            Nah I’m with you. I don’t use spyware apps (surprised? Shouldn’t be, I’m on lemmy lol, and was 2y before ths exodus.) so the only one I could use is alovoa which I hear nobody uses anyway, and even then I haven’t uploaded a pic of myself for privacy reasons since before 2014 so I’m not thrilled about that prospect, and the only acceptible place to talk to a strange woman is “the bar” but since I more or less quit drinking (my max is now like 3 in a night because I quit for a year and now have no tolerance and have to work at 7am anyway), and all the women I’ve met in the bar so far over these last 10yr seem to be “functioning for a month or so” alcoholics (the last one was abusive to boot), and now-a-days all I do is work, food store, home anyways so basically I’d have to see an attractive woman in the Aldi and what, strike up a convo about the basil pesto mac and cheese? “Hey this is weird but I saw you from across the frozen food section and I was wondering if you’re not seeing anyone maybe you’d like to grab some coffee?” Can’t do that, that’s creepy, gotta do the swipe in the appropriate direction on the god-rectangle.

              • ArcaneSlime@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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                1 year ago

                Most of my hobbies are kinda loner hobbies. I like books, can’t meet women in the book store; I like comic books, comic stores are similarly out, and can’t be the 400th creepy guy at a con to try and talk to a cosplayer; I like music, can’t be the creepy guy trying to meet women at a show; I like walking through the botanical gardens near me, but can’t be the creepy guy trying to talk to women there either, etc. All of my hobbies easily can be enjoyed with others, but typically others you already know and bring, or meet there (as in drive separately).

      • ZombieTheZombieCat@lemm.ee
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        1 year ago

        the statistics don’t lie that men have stopped approaching women because it’s not worth the potential headache

        Where are these stats about how often men approach women

      • otp@sh.itjust.works
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        1 year ago

        being labeled a “creep” has caused most men to just say “fuck it it’s not worth the effort”

        No, most men have not said that.

  • Vincent Adultman@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    10 years ago when I started going to the gym I was ugly as fuck. Pimples in my face, fucking 55kg (121 American bullshit), weird face due to fucked up teeth. A buffed dude noticed me in my 2nd week and started to talk to me and asking me to reach his weights for him, spot, etc. He told me that he started skinny AF too and I would grow eventually. I think if it wasn’t for that, I would drop the gym and hate it for the rest of my life.

    Thank you wholesome chads

      • kase@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        Apparently “wigger” means white + n-word. Like for white people who ‘act black’.

        (Just repeating others in the thread, I’ve never heard this word before)

          • chicken@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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            1 year ago

            Last time I saw it used regularly was on edgy internet forums in like 2003 by the same people trying to say that the n-word isn’t racist because they only are talking about the ‘bad ones’. Maybe what happened is polarization where people who don’t want to be racist accepted that broadly disparaging ethnic cultures is also bad, and people who do want to be racist decided that actually it is about genetics more than culture, so it stopped making sense for anyone to say.

        • littlecolt@lemm.ee
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          1 year ago

          Yeah I was about to comment. Like, imagine using the word “wigger” unironically in 2009, let alone 2019 when this post is from. Hopefully anon can step away from 4chan for a while and learn some good habits from this Chad.

          • otp@sh.itjust.works
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            1 year ago

            We used “wangster” instead. It wasn’t even a conscious decision to use something less offensive, but it worked

  • CryptidBestiary@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    Everyone had to start somewhere. This applies to the dedicated gym people and they are well aware of the struggles of coming into the gym as a newcomer. Most people in the gym are too focused on their workouts to judge other people. Those who do are actual losers and posers with insecurities

    • Chariotwheel@kbin.social
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      1 year ago

      Yeah, in my experience gym goers are pretty helpful and will ask if they can help if they see someone not too familiar with excersises.

      When I was for the first time in a gym I had no idea what I was doing and was just randomly going from tool to tool. Someone saw that asked me if I had a traiing plan. Of course I didn’t and he made me a simple one and gave it to me the next time I was there and explained some basics to me and how I should mofify it for what I wanted to achieve.

    • Shou@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      I agree, though often negative expecations come from expetiences too. If you got bullied in high school, the idea that there are people who want to help you becomes alien.

      Being terminally online is not always the root cause of a skewed view of reality. It’s one step away from anxiety alone.

      • ThatWeirdGuy1001@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        Yeah people ignore that shit people exist and there are people who are worse off because of it.

        I wouldn’t even call what I went through bullying it was attempted murder and me having ptsd from it isn’t my fault

        • jdf038
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          1 year ago

          Hope it’s improving for you! I went through that level of it too.

          What sucks is the gaslighting every time I brought it up. My parents, teachers, and others would act like I started it. Pisses me off looking back to it today.