So I landed a really nice job with a really cool company and they plan on hiring me this March, but before they can do that I need to pass a drug test. My manager personally doesn’t care whether or not I smoke weed but I live in a state where weed is illegal, and the company does care and would bar me from hiring if I were to fail a drug test.

I was stupid and smoked a fuck ton of weed last Sunday (before I knew that A; I need to take a drug test in the first place, and B; that weed can remain present in urine for up to (and possibly over) 30 days in frequent smokers (which I am)). This would originally have been fine if it weren’t for the fact that after agreeing to the background check, I would be scheduled for a drug test by the 13th (within 4 days). So my original plan to just drink a shit ton of water to flush myself out within a month wouldn’t work.

I also had a plan to sneak in a jar of my sober friend’s pee but then I learned that you’re actually required to pee in front of the observer so that plan wouldn’t work either.

So basically I’m fucked and I don’t know what to do :( My future pretty much depends on this job and I don’t know what I would do if I were to fuck this opportunity up. What do I do?

Also, idk how relevant this is but I’m 5’9" (~175 cm), 160 lbs (~72.6 kg), AMAB, and very infrequently exercise. I also have POTS so I sweat frequently and have poor water retention.

  • homhom9000 [she/her]@hexbear.net
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    9 months ago

    Everyone has great tips. I’m just here to say, I’m nearly twice your weight and was able to pass a drug test in a short timeframe, <30 days but more than 10, so I don’t think it’s over for you.

    I bougt a bunch of cheap drug test and tested frequently, throught the day. I got a few of these drinks called Qcarbo32 that I think worked. It turns the pee a funny color so that’s really where the water and cranberry juice helps. Spend a day testing your pee with different combination of techniques to see if you can run clean.

    On day of don’t give the first pee of the day and when you do give try to catch mid stream. You can practice this with at home test too, I found early day pee would test positive and later day pee would test negative same for mid or early stream.

    So all in all, testing frequently at home helped the most. Good luck!

    • grey_wolf_whenever [he/him]@hexbear.net
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      9 months ago

      This is good advice! I did the same a few years ago, buy yourself some tests and start experimenting. Try to eat really healthy and exercise as well, I’m not actually sure if it helps but it feels like it helps.