People who make me feel like crap or worse off then when I encountered them consistently are written off and out of my life
Doesn’t matter if its family, nobody is entitled to your attention and suffering and it does nobody any real good for you to succumb to the inevitable dysfunction it creates in your life and relationships and also material conditions.
[Self-replying to avoid editing the above.]
Or perhaps a better first rule would be “judging and acting only come after understanding”.
These are both good rulesets