Says the guy who’s wife has definitely had an affair already

“But I never thought they’d eat MY face”

Most men that age went to war

Verizon at least has a block by area code setting and that’s saved me a lot of headache

God… fuckin… don’t scare my dyslexic ass like that…

Was so happy they brought those back for BoBF

Itty bitty baby hands

It would be if they didn’t then shit in the corner and blame you for making them smell their shit

It common practice to curate your resume to the job you’re applying for, you can smell the bullshit drifting off this one

Oh yikes that’s so much worse than I thought, she recoiled like a full diaper got shoved in her face

Yeah, in prison

Not from a star wars crossover unfortunately. This is absolute Batman, a Bruce Wayne who is just a city engineer not a billionaire so he makes all his gear from what he can find

https://static.wikia.nocookie.net/p__/images/3/33/Batman_and_Alfred_Pennyworth_(Absolute_Universe)_02.jpg/revision/latest?cb=20241011171744&path-prefix=protagonist

Warhammer has its own community but theyre of course welcome here

Crunch…

You’re a good person ass-worm

Add it on the pile hoss, there’s a lot of shit to shovel

“She is strong and he is scared”

Abbot needs to sit on a splintery post and start spinning

I think that’s mostly incidental, more related to the time supermarket eggs spend in storage before they make it to your plate

This was always the case, just stated explicitly now