We’re like to extend our most sincere apologies for today’s downtime, explain the issue, and talk about what we’ll be doing going forward.

Late last night or early this morning, an owl entered the server room and, unsurprisingly, pissed on everything. We had to drag them out of a corner where they’d started building a nest out of CAT5 cables. After checking with all our keyholders, we determined that they had not tricked someone into lending them the keys this time, and nobody had left a window open. We have not found their entry point yet, but we suspect we are getting closer (we’ve found a large pile of shit near one of the vents).
We managed to dry one server off and get the website running again, but unfortunately we only have 1 hair dryer and will need a few more days to dry the rest of the servers and get the site fully operational.

Going forward, our plan is:

  • Cover outside AC vents and similar in chicken wire
  • assess and reinforce weak points in the building’s structure
  • tape old CDs to the building to reflect the sun and scare them away
  • attack roosting spikes to the server racks
  • stop keeping open, uncovered cans of beans at our desks

We are also looking into hiring a falconer as a more active deterrent.

Thank you for your patience in such a difficult time.

  • goog [any]@hexbear.net
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    7 months ago

    Go on, you know you want to hit it with a jesse-wtf

    Cmon my little Discord kittens, it’s longer than two sentences. You’re not actually going to read it are you? That would take too long. It’s time for jesse-wtf

      • goog [any]@hexbear.net
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        7 months ago

        Nice Discord emote that was customized into a programmer hobbyist version of reddit. Really telegraphs how much more in touch with nature and society you are than I am. Gonna reconsider my life.

        • booty [he/him]@hexbear.net
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          7 months ago

          i wish i could be in tune with nature, i just got home from a 12 hour shift and logged on to laugh at some commie shitposts and i see you having an absolutely normal one in here. go do something with your life dude

          • goog [any]@hexbear.net
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            7 months ago

            Ask yourself, is it really about being against wrecking? Or is it desperately trying to find another stranger emotionally labile enough to feel shamed by a bunch of random people who’ve decided to brand themselves as “the chapo subreddit in exile”? At this point I think the objective it to act like you don’t understand what I’m saying. You certainly don’t have anything to say to me other than “isn’t it weird that you noticed?” - no, it isn’t weird. It would be weird to pretend not to notice how people use this website. Lemmy votes are public when viewed off instance fun fact. Figured out what’s going on here years ago. I send letters because I care. I think there’s some part of you losers that still wants to grow. So don’t get all depressed, make big moves. Don’t go with the default option and just stay in America and speculate about moving to the Netherlands. Everyone does that. It’s so annoying.

            Whenever anyone in my life finds out I’m going to Vietnam, do you know what they say to me? Not “oh that’s so cool, omg you’re going to see so much cool shit” they ask “huh?? why??” and I say “WHAT WAS THE QUESTION? THIS WALKWAY IS TOO CLOSE TO THE HIGHWAY FOR THE ROARING TO DIMINISH I DIDN’T CATCH THAT”

          • goog [any]@hexbear.net
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            7 months ago

            You could have left it at the emote and pretended you were joking if you wanted, but if you want to send me bitterness, I will again return the truth. You all picked the wrong pastime. Liberal idealism with mild discomfort added for spice, and participation or passive spectating in the activist-NGO complex.

          • goog [any]@hexbear.net
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            7 months ago

            I’ve written entire papers about this place & others like it (not specifically don’t worry I’m not trying to ruin anything, but I felt like striking back against the world’s Alexander Reid Ross type nerds!), and hundreds of blogs now, about the peculiarities of the PSL and DSA and CPUSA and all these online liberals. It’s a pretty rich seam to mine. Can you blame me for giving back instead of passively treating you people like lolcows? I don’t have that attitude. You see people criticizing stuff on here but they never leave to take their criticism to the source any longer. You all learned your lesson from walking up to Lord Fauntleroy and his five inbred children and calling him a virgin. It just doesn’t make sense.

          • goog [any]@hexbear.net
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            7 months ago

            I am, I’m telling people I’ve known for years that I’ve been watching them decaying. It’s a wonderful hobby. I do this to people I know who destroyed their lives with drugs, too. They act smug as well. My cancerous, decrepit uncle tried to come at me, even. I just keep getting smugger and smugger by the day.