“Nearly every social event I have attended with [communists] has inevitably had some conversation about linux, furry culture, obscure leftist history, tabletop games, or other equally nerdy subjects”
Join our public Matrix server! https://matrix.to/#/#traacha:transfem.dev
As a reminder, please do not discuss current struggle sessions in the mega. We want this to be a little oasis for all of us and the best way to do that is not to feed into existing conflict on the site.
Also, be sure to properly give content warnings and put sensitive subjects behind proper spoiler tags. It’s for the mental health of not just your comrades, but yourself as well.
Here is a screenshot of where to find the spoiler button.
genital-related query
Is it weird to moisturize your balls?
Probably depends if you’re shaving them or not. A sensitive moisturiser is probably fine if you are. Otherwise it’s maybe overkill.
Of course I shave them
Something I’ve learned from Xiaohongshu is that goth lesbians very much transcend language and nationality
anyone want to work with me
i could do with competent coworkers
Ye
I’d say yes, but I’m not competent
Just saw on xhs that some trans women in china use 🍥 as a trans symbol because of the packaging a lot of them get their E in.
This is so cute I love it, no notes.
you should tell them to join our matrix lol
Looks like the Debian logo
Reminder to join our group chat :D We had a name change
god damn that girl in the mirror is finally starting to just look like a clocky ass trans femme and not just some kind of soft faced guy now this is really nice
mental health, family shit, trauma but like, turning a corner and optimistic
Had an awful day and a really ugly family blowup
Thought I might actually lose it
Made it through the day with no incidents
Even did my gym sets and got girl scout cookies ordered from (former) crush (they’re apparently a troupe leader and have been since they were a kid? Anyways yay cookies, they’re nice and I think I’m mostly over my emo shit about that but w/e)
Anyways despite having been really tempted to commit (several) felonies and barely preventing myself from that, I decided after that to find a therapist again and work on CPTSD shit
I may not be able to fully get my shit together yet, but I’m now open to consulting with a shit-cartographer to at least map out where my shit isn’t together
Finished apothecary diary, honestly recommend it enough that I’m gonna check out the mawhwa or however you spell it.
oh shit i read the manga ages ago
it got an anime?
It did, my sibling been telling me of it for a while so we watched it together. Over two days saw the total 24 episodes
I need sleep bad rn but worth it
The new Worst of All Possible Worlds is really good
Actually lol’d several times
Yelled at my boss about patient care stuff (boring beaurocratic stuff, she’s making exceptions to our off service adult patients and it keeps being a problem when she’s not around because of it). That was cool
I’m not afraid of confrontation but I always feel like an asshole after even if I was “right” or whatever or had a good reason to
Once again crying over the simple pleasure of warm leftover stew
cw for depression but this is a positive story. This is basically just me journaling but also you get to read it
So about five years ago I was an extremely depressed teenager. I remember crying for hours on hours one night, and then after that, I kind of turned off my intense emotions as a defense mechanism. I could still laugh or be annoyed, but I couldn’t cry or see beauty or be angry at the world.
This winter was the most difficult of my life. I’ve messed up, I’ve lost friendships, I’ve failed in college, I’ve been addicted to weed, I’ve not been the person I want to be. But I was also able to cry for the first time in five years. Not just sniffles and a tear, proper bawling my head off ugly crying. And since then, I have been able to cry at bad things and good things. I got rejected by someone I liked and I cried - last time that happened, and the time before, I felt nothing. I watched the final episode of Mob Psycho and I cried a lot. I didn’t cry when it first came out, and I already knew what was going to happen. I’d seen it before, but I cried this time. I also sat on a bench with my friends and looked at the Irish coast and saw the light and the colours and movement and it was beautiful.
Growing is hard and painful. Its one thing to know this intellectually, and another entirely to experience it. You also don’t get to choose when you grow. It just happens out of necessity. I’m about to turn 22 and I’ve only just realized how much time I could have ahead of me, and I need to decide how I’m going to live.
I like analyzing media and looking at characters. I criticize bad character arcs and appreciate strong characterisation. But I’ve just begun trying in earnest to write a novel, and I’ve realized how little I actually understand about the human experience. How can I write about things I’ve never gone through? I don’t know, but I’ll try.
I’m becoming an adult, for real, actually this time. When I started college I was only an adult in technicality. Now I’m soon leaving college and I’ve been forced to change. It makes me want to change myself on purpose, and control who I am. When I started college I felt sad, because I felt like I was closing the chapter of my life that was childhood, which I never wanted to end. Now I’m leaving college and I feel like the training wheels have come off, and I can be so much faster and freer. Living is a strange thing, and I’d like to find out more about it.
Much love
Kinda out of it rn but I’d love to reply better later
The more I think about it, the less I care about changing all my documents and shit. The name I use for paperwork basically never comes up in normal interactions, and when it does I genuinely just find it funny. Like, a security guard one time who said “huh, thats a weird name to give to a girl, what was your mom thinking!!” or an old ass man who looked at me like Im an alien when
and he looked up my registration. Maybe I’m stupid cuz it might put me in danger or something, but after 4 ish years of being stealth, I don’t even care about being outed anymore. Actually, I kinda wish I was more visually trans sometimes, because I know for a fact some of the people I work with and see every day don’t know any trans people (or at least don’t know that they know) and only hear about them on fox news and shit. Anyways… Ramble over, thanks for reading it :DI used to feel similar, I don’t like the idea of the government having an official record of me transing my gender, but at the same time being deadnamed and misgendered on official documents sucks.
this shit ain’t nothing to me ma’am
(similar feels)
((would like to get an “x” and my name on my documents but like, I don’t wanna attract any more “hey I’m a subversive” attention than I have to and would like to leave
for good at some point before the decade’s out))
hawk you i won’t tuah you tell me
pee pee, poo poo,.even
delet this
mention of transphobic "friends"
I expressed frustration that some people I used to associate myself with cared more about the shape of my hardware than me as a person and was told that a big problem in left wing circles is ascribing malicious intent to people with good intentions.
I’m sorry but what good intentions can I ascribe to transphobes? I have explicitly told every person who had a bad reaction to me coming out to them that if they asked me why I’d chosen to transition I’d tell them, and not one of them have asked. They objectively do not care to understand me. What good intentions can I possibly ascribe to a person who intentionally invalidates me knowing it hurts me?
know the feeling
