This is, very simply, child abuse.
It’s satire
Honestly, I’m not sure that is satire
How sure are you
I wish
Humor at its darkest - at best.
This is layered… Not only will the kids grow up incorrectly believing that the earth is flat, they are also going to grow up resenting people that disagree with what their parents say, eventually they may even resent their parents for forcing their false beliefs on them and making them look foolish in front of their peers.
I have met a Flat Earth conspiracy believer mom who was homeschooling her kid, explaining how the sphere Earth model is wrong and so on, her complaint was that despite her best efforts to
indoctrinateeducate her child, the child was not convinced that the Earth is flat. It goes to show that some children are just too intelligent to fall for this kinda shit. The child was eight or nine years old I think.Reminds me of Aron Ra, he grew up in a mormon family, but in his case they waited with the indoctrinating until he was old enough, which was when he was eight
But as he himself said “by then it was already too late”
When his mother sat him down and started reading to him from the book of mormon, he just pointed out things that were wrong and stupid.
Remember, if you want your kids to believe the stupid things you believe, start early and don’t let them see or hear too much about reality, or you’ll have a bad time
The thought of a nine year old looking at a “grown” women with disbelief as the women tries explaining the flat earth BS is actually fucking jokes lol
Reminds me of Aron Ra, he grew up in a mormon family, but in his case they waited with the indoctrinating until he was old enough, which was when he was eight
But as he himself said “by then it was already too late”
When his mother sat him down and started reading to him from the book of mormon, he just pointed out things that were wrong and stupid.
Remember, if you want your kids to believe the stupid things you believe, start early and don’t let them see or hear too much about reality, or you’ll have a bad time
I babysat a girl who came to me and asked if atoms were really little crosses, like her grandmother taught her. She was confused because the teacher at school was saying something different
I told her to listen to her teacher
Gives off “my grandma said Cleopatra was black” vibes.
Strong “Waterboy” vibes
My Mama says that alligators are ornery because they got all them teeth and no toothbrush.
All of this effort just to teach your kids… flat earth?! Could’ve been spent to teach them gardening, electronics, paintings, literally anything else would’ve been more useful for the child’s future.
If it makes you feel any better, chances are the kids will learn pretty quick they were taught BS and will probably just disown Mom at some point.
I knew a kid who was home schooled, and while he wasn’t taught anything as looney as flat earth, he absolutely knew that some of what he was taught was BS
If it makes you feel any better, chances are the kids will learn pretty quick they were taught BS and will probably just disown Mom at some point.
I knew a kid who was home schooled, and while he wasn’t taught anything as looney as flat earth, he absolutely knew that some of what he was taught was BS
It’s not just flat earth, spot the mention of “verses.” It’s the whole young earth creationism belief complex.
I’ve tried this experiment in Blender by projecting a NASA earth texture onto a circular plane to see if I could even come up with something where the day/night solstice/equinox cycles make any kind of sense, couldn’t make it work.
I do think that if you really wanted to upset these folks, though, you’d insist that Australia is actually at the center of the earth.
I have never through of that…how is day an night supposed to work on a flat earth? Like Minecraft they just…rotate around? What about the underside of the earth? The other side of the coin…do people live there too? Can we visit them if we dig a hole?
The flatearthers are gonna hunt you, better not ask those questions
The sun is apparently more like a flashlight than an orb. That would be the only way this could work, but even Terry Pratchett knew that this doesn’t make any sense
…wait and how does it become night? Like the lantern gets turn off? What about when it’s night in a place but morning on another?
It would rotate around, like in the model. Since it’s more like a flashlight there would be no scattering of the light. There would only be day right under the sun. That’s the only way this would make any sense at all, and even then That’s kinda meh
Burh I would honestly have even more questions,who holds the lantern? What about the sunset? And sunrise?
I have no idea, and “they” prevent us from finding out
(/s)
What do the pillars of the earth stand on?
4 elephants and a turtle.
What does the turtle stand on?
The elephants
Wait so flat earth thinks the earth is flat but the moon and sun are not?? How does that work?
What do you mean? You’re seeing how it works right here.
Sun and moon are spherical objects suspended by a coat hanger and constantly turned in motion by a higher being.
This physically pains me.
Omitting Great A’Tuin and simplyfing the 4 elephants to be “pillars". Now that’s just lazy parenting.
Yeah, but even if they tried to stick to a faithful representation of reality, the whole “turtles all the way down” part would be problematic.
Have these kids even read Discworld?
Reminds me of when I started going to public school and learned about evolution, something my Evangelical parents always taught me was a lie.
Thankfully my education broke me out of that, but it put me behind a little bit.
Jeez man, i can only imagine. At least you were among the lucky ones who were smart and confident enough to resist their parents misbeliefs.
But how would the flat each get between the floating moon sun orbs to make an eclipse?
How dare you bring logic into this
Yup that was foolish of me.
deleted by creator
deleted by creator
deleted by creator
when in doubt: mysterious shadow object, lmao.
“According to flat-Earth conspiracy theorists, this astronomical phenomenon — known as a total lunar eclipse — was actually a rare opportunity to catch a glimpse of a mysterious “shadow object” that orbits the sun and occasionally passes in front of the moon from our point of view here, on an allegedly pizza-shaped Earth.”
source: https://www.space.com/43086-flat-earthers-explain-lunar-eclipses.html
It’s not that I can’t workout how to make that work with some super massive object. It’s that it’s so ridiculous to do so that I won’t bother. All hail mysterious shadow object!
I’m going to name it “the mooon”
You’re not far off, the actual term for this in astronomy is close to moon, but instead of the extra ‘o’ in the middle as you have here, it’s an ‘r’.
I hear it’s where the Flying Spaghetti Monster lives.
It’s one of the meatballs, isn’t it?
Man this is just sad
So how does night time exist in a model like this? It looks like the sun just rotates above the Earth?
Everyone knows the sun is switched off during night time, DUH !
If i know right, they think the sun has much less power than usual, so it works like a spotlight. So its light wont reach the territories under the moon
Of course. That explains why when day transitions to night you see the Sun zoom off into the distance until it diminishes to nothing, with the Moon zooming in from the opposite direction until it’s big enough to see.
Is there a badparents Lemmy group?
You mean to say this horror story has a part 2? :(
I just assumed, thats just too big of a cliffhanger
